How I Spent My Summer Vacation, or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love "Bob": The Elder Gods Must be Crazy 2: Secret of the Ooze: Part 1

The REAL X-Day! (RX-Day, "2022") + DIY X-Day ("2022")

I have been neglectful of this blog for some time now, but I have a good reason; I have been perpetually stoned since RX-Day, in June. 

I'm a city boy, so my experience with camping in any capacity is null, so I bought a $40 tent, brought a pillow and blanket, and figured that was all I needed. For once I was right. All other accommodations were provided by the RX-Day cabal, and Mother Nature herself. 

With no recollection of how I got there, I found myself at The Real X-Day (or, RX-Day) this year by way of Rev. Prof. Trixie Von Mothersbaugh, Rev. Sir Loin, and Nexpir (Nixper? Neepir??? I honestly can't remember how to spell his name; cool guy tho). I met up with them in the Catskills and we drove *somewhere* to get to the appropriate campsite to enjoy the end of the world.  The organizer of this event, the incredibly hospitable and mysterious (also incredibly inebriated) man known solely as, The Senator.  Good dude by my estimation, lots of fun to chat with, and his cabal of ninja assassins was pretty good too. You could barely see them skulking in the shadows.

One thing I really loved about the campsite was seeing all the weird bugs I've never seen before. I woke up one morning and saw this beautiful translucent slug. Cutest booger I've ever seen.    

One of the great joys of RX-Day was being able to witness the mind-boggling answerfest that was The Ask Dr. Hal Show! Dr. Hal was of course answering questions, Pontious Pressure was co-hosting, and Saint Joyce was there gathering questions from the curious crowd of people who had questions and the money to pay for the appropriate answers. There was poetry of all sorts, funny retorts, stories about the origins of the show, and an auction for Dr. Hal's rare book about the true nature of missing socks! 

There was all sorts of bands playing genres of music I had never heard live before. Every genre of music under the sun, and even some new genres never dared played by mortals before this very event! The gods were upset with us playing and listening to these sacred and secret notes of music, so they dropped a shit-ton of rain on us during most of the event. It's fine tho, all the rain and mud did was remind us of our primitive SubGenius nature, and sure we complained a lot, but we also groaned a lot as well, so I guess it evened out.

If I can get the band list from The Senator (or whomever) I will update this post with links to all of them. I was pretty stoned, and it's been a few months, so my memory is hazy at best. I do remember Rubix Pube though! They were a lot of fun.

Here is the goodies and treasure box filled with Rubix Pube merch. I purchased a CD and a lighter from them. I'm not sure what genre of music you'd call them tho. Something like eldritch spazz metal-grunge, or something like that would be my guess, but they describe themselves as Mountain-Based Mutant Rock which is probably a better description. 
 

Here I am during my "Bobtism" wherein I rededicate myself to the SubGenius Forbidden Sciences, reclaim my Yeti heritage, and try not to fall over like a stoned log as Dr. Hal pours a cup of water on my noggin. With so many of my SubGenius family doing this together, it was really something to behold. Just a bunch of sweaty, wet, drunk weirdos screaming out their incredible church names; it was an incredible feeling.  

So yeah, we did kill and burn the "Bob" effigy, as per "Bob's" own instructions. The wretched blood-curling screams coming from the flames will haunt my dreams for the rest of eternity. Probably the coolest souvenir ever. I threw in another Dobbshead printout into the flames to really make sure "Bob" was dead. As "Bob" burned we danced, drank, sang songs, and drank some more. 

SO! As you probably guessed, the world didn't end yet. BUT! That doesn't mean that The Real X-Day WASN'T the REAL X-DAY. No no, you rube. It WAS! It's just there was this glitch in the matrix, subterranean forces messed with the equilibrium of the stars, The Senator's ankle chakra got fudged up, and the aliens that were mean to destroy the earth arrived AFTER RX-Day! Ya see, it was all a scheduling snafu, but next year for sure! 

As a consolation for the world not ending, I did manage to find some Mountain Dew flavors I never tasted before. They kept me sustained and caffeinated during my trip. 

One the way back from RX-Day, Prof. Trixie and her Mutants Unite cabal and I began planning next years trip to RX-Day (if there is one I mean, the last one was the REAL Real X-Day of course).  And an amazing thing happened, a visage of Jesus appeared under my slice of pizza! Praise "Bob"! 

It was a really fun trip. Many thanks to The Senator for putting this shindig together, and a million thank yous to Prof. Trixie and the Mutants Unite crew, my friends from Diaspora, and anyone else who was there.  

Next time, part 2: my trip to Chile! 

UPDATE: I nearly forgot to mention the traditional X-Day, this year known as DIY X-Day! ... the saucers didn't show up again, and some of us met on Discord to complain about it. NEXT YEAR FOR SURE!!! 

How To Survive Ego Death: A Personal Perspective

The past few years have been awful. Just like, the absolute era of my life. I would hazard a guess that many of you have felt similarly, for all sorts of different reasons. Alternatively, I hope a lot of you have had a wondrous and fantastic time; unfortunately I did not. And there are differing reasons for that to be sure, and if I could go back and change it all I would. Maybe. At my current vantage point, I wonder if I would choose to go back and change anything because I am personally going through a shift in my life that I actually like, and things are so hopeful now that the absolute obliteration of everything I ever loved and cared for seems to have been worth it. 

That's not to say I'm happy for all the sour feelings, strained friendships, and total sense of loss I feel, but there is something refreshing in having a totally clean slate to work off of. Tearing apart and throwing away all of the things that held my life together like glue was extremely, painfully difficult, even if I knew it had to be done. I am a whole person, and I am incapable of robotizing my emotions. I hold sensitive feelings towards those I love, and even particular items; and even if both of those are incapable of feeling the same way towards me I can't help how I feel towards them.

The world I wanted to live and grow old and die in has already gone and died without me. Familiar faces gone, loves of my life have moved on, folks I worked with have advanced in their paths far beyond my reach, and some friends I have simply lost touch with even if we are all more connected now than we have ever been. No amount of wishful thinking, nostalgia, toys, comics, trading cards or junk food can help fill the void I have felt. I sit in abject loneliness, in a void where I once lived my life, seemingly defeated. 

As stated earlier though, in spite of my own feelings, I have been given a second chance for what feels like the fourth or fifth time in my life. Somehow though I feel like this time the second chance will stick. There is an idiotic force of confidence you can latch onto when you have nothing else. It isn't a feeling too dissimilar to invulnerability. In my current state I feel invincible because I have literally nothing else to lose! I'm not even looking to fight my way to the top because I don't think I was ever there to begin with! I have always existed in confusion and it is through the acceptance of confusion that I think I will be able to survive best. 

That's just me though. You might not enjoy being confused all the time, but however you choose to cope through your own downfall is your business really. At this present moment, as I write this, I have no plans. None. Zero. And to be honest, that's fine for now. You don't always need a goal to keep going, all you have to do is go. Enjoy the time you have with yourself, and don't feel pressured to be sociable if you don't want to be. Go to new places, take weird changes, manipulate how you take in information and readjust your view on reality. Grab a blanket and some snacks and quest into the unknown and do something that your now dead-self would be too chicken shit to try!

If you don't matter to yourself then you will never matter at all. Maybe. You might also matter to someone else. But maybe not. In either case do something that has heft to it, something dramatic. You don't have to tell people what you did, but you can if you'd like of course, but whatever it is make sure it holds some significance to you personally. Sing, dance, get a tattoo, ask someone out on a date (or multiple someones), wear a dumb tie, or whatever. 

If that doesn't tickle your fancy, talk to your friends, or your one friend, or even that co-worker you don't really care much for. Literally find anyone so you don't get trapped in your own thoughts! The contrast is good and healthy! FORCE YOURSELF TO TALK TO PEOPLE! Honestly, in most cases you'll be glad you did. You may even make a friend or two.

Observe all the good shit in your life. You got some for sure, but you might be resentful you don't have a lot more of it, but at least you have some. Become aware of all that stuff because you might not have a lot of it now, but if one day it were to vanish the feeling of loss will devastate you. 

Another thing you should do, as a form of self care, is drink water. Like, drink a lot of water. It's good for you, helps your metabolism, and right now you're probably not getting enough water as you might need. That's probably a statistic; look it up. Water tastes great too, especially seltzer. Try Liquid Death if you can find it, it has a nice mellow fizz and it mutilates thirst. 

And that's it I guess. At any moment the life you build for yourself could potentially just turn dust. I think we all think about that as often as we think about death. It's good to be prepared for these types of emergencies. It's a shame there's no real way to prepare... 

UNLESS...!! Yes, of course! It's all so simple! Why the fuck did I over complicate my life with pesky thoughts and personal insights when the answer was right under my nose the whole time! To hell with everything you just read about trying new things, making friends, accepting yourself, and staying hydrated, just give "Bob" all your money! That will definitely solve all of your problems and you'll be able to survive everything! Why yes! Of course! You can survive your own personal doomsday by purchasing a genuine SubGenius Ordainment Kit! Be the first on your block to live through the End Times, today!! 

My accidental part in meme history (whoops)

 So, back in the early 2000's I used to hang out in a bunch of online groups. Early social media stuff like LiveJournal, YahooGroups (formerly eGroups), MSN Groups, etc., and I really enjoyed sharing spooky or weird images on those platforms. I would use most of the popular search engines at the time (Alta Vista was a personal favorite because I felt like most people weren't using it) and do my best to find stuff that was just odd to look at. 

In my circle of friends at the time, we didn't really use the word meme (we knew it but mispronounced it usually as "me-me"), and instead used the phrase "image virus", which came from an artist online who became somewhat famous for his "HTML Image Virus" trend. At some point the term memes became more prominent and "image virus" slowly dissipated into obscurity. 

About a month ago (or over a month ago) I was  contacted by a person who was a part of a investigation group trying to find the origins of the famous "Jeff the Killer" image that was used for creepypasta stories. An earlier version of that Jeff image, apparently called "prettyFace" was an image I recognized from nearly 20 years ago because I do remember finding it in one of my searches and sharing it around. This person who contacted me told me the shocking news that he had found me after a lengthy search online and by his own research says I may have been the first person in the West to share this image outside of Japan. I was of course shocked. 

As usual, "Bob" was right, "The stupider it looks, the more important it probably is."

I will admit, I didn't really connect the prettyFace image to the Jeff image at all. Maybe because they're so prominent in the internet zeitgeist, at least for me, that I just got used to them. I do recall there being one or two other images alongside the prettyFace image, but that might also be my own faulty memory. I found it on an image board of some kind where a bunch of images were being shared. At one point I may even have had those images but that was several computers ago. 

What I find interesting is that the YouTuber BlameitonJorge is once again circling around my interests. He has already mentioned the Church of the SubGenius, The MayDay Mystery, and now this. I feel like one day I'm might have to reach out and say hi to the guy 😆

To be fair, I don't know if I am the first person in the West to share this image. When I saw it floating around I thought folks just found it the same way I did. If it was me though, what a ripple effect. How funny that a dumb image I shared on a dumb message board somewhere would come back to haunt me after all these years. 

I hope the folks investigating find the origins of the image. Like a lot of the world mysteries I'm sure the answer will be incredibly mundane, but it's never about the destination it's about the journey. 

Here are some links if you want to understand this whole thing:

BlameitonJorge video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVAie3i18SA

TheGamerfromMars video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lF_8Tj00x60

Lost Media Wiki article: https://lostmediawiki.com/Jeff_the_Killer_(lost_original_unedited_image_of_Creepypasta_character;_2005)

Then there was Billikinoid

"Billiken at Coney Island" by ZONTAR

Spontaneous introspection brought me here today. I was guided by unseen forces, but I knew they were sent to me by Billiken-1, God of Things As They Ought to Be, my guardian spirit. I might be crazy, and that's just dandy. I have finally blundered my way to nigh-enlightenment and I hope I slip on a banana peel soon so I can make it the rest of the way there. 

Life, as I have always griped about, is nothing but discord normally but lately it has been filled with a new flavor. I have found some new friends to chat with, new friends to play with, and I have reunited with some old friends to help ease the burden in my heart from past mistakes and I feel reinvigorated. 

So why "Billikinoid"? Well it is what I is, I think. As an emissary for Billiken-1, I am without question one of his kin, yet in this humanoid body. I will break through the barrier tho and ascend to my rightful place someday, when I reach my cosmic form. I am filled with the holiest of spirits gosh dang it!

Moving forward, I would like to dedicate more of this blog to even more nonsense; toys, comics, trading cards, religion, and travel. As much as possible until your very screen begins to OOZE with it all! I want you to be dripping with it! 

Until next time then 😜

And there will come... A REBRANDING

So I did that thing where I forgot to update this blog again. If you follow me on social media you know I've been around, but I've been busy with preparing to move and take other steps in creating a new life for myself. I'm at that age where I can sort of feel the cold embrace of Father Time clasping onto my shoulder as if to say, "hurry up and live while you still can". 

With so much changing in my life, like the way I take care of my health, where I live, and my plans for the future, I felt I should really begin that inner weirdo I've been suppressing for most of my life. I've been holding myself back creatively because I always found myself trying to please others, and ignoring my own wants. I don't have many dreams or goals I want to accomplish, but the few that I have are deserving of my attention and I'd like to shoot for them while I have the time to.

I've even renamed myself within The Church of the SubGenius. I am now Rev. Dr. Jellyfoot. It's taking my pals a while to get used to my new moniker, but they'll come around I'm sure. 

In the future, this blog's name will change as well (for like the third or fourth time). I do have some things I want to share here, photos, and interesting experiences but I think I'll save that for another day when I have more to say about them. Actually I'd like to share more of my collection like in an online gallery or something if I can figure out how. Maybe I'll finally give Instagram a shot. 

It's scary but also a little exciting to be going through so many new things. Last year I thought I wasn't going to live long enough to see my birthday, but this year I'm filled with new zest and an appreciation for life I've never had before. Things are looking up and I'm finally learning how to balance all the elements of my life. 

2022: Billikens and Budai; Year of the Slurfies

It's been a long while since my last post. I haven't died yet! Things have just gotten complicated and busy is all. I'm approaching a new horizon in my life, restarting it all yet again, and hopefully things will get better from this point on. I say that, but of course the future is always uncertain. 

Above is my New Years altar, filled with Billikens and Budai, Slurfies and anime girls and all my favorite little toy novelties. All brought together in hopes to gather enough cosmic power to bring us all luck for 2022. Heaven knows we really need it. So, with prayers mumbled I wish you all a very prosperous New Year. 

But yeah Slurfies. You know Slurfies. don't you? Of course you do you've seen them before if you are of a certain again. Little soft plastic monster toys they used to have in vending machines way back in the day. It was for a while a very common thing you could get for a few cents, but now they cost a few dollars to purchase via places like eBay.  You could get them in the same vending machines that had little containers of slime, rubber bats, play jewelry, and holographic stickers. Those were the glory days if you ask me. 

I recently discovered this amazing online shop called Greasy Creeps and I am totally in love with their stock. It's a combination of vintage toys (oilys, jigglers, Chinasaurs, etc.) as well as their own original designs and bootlegs. It's a satisfying feeling purchasing artisanally made Slurfies, but that's just my life now. Wondrous. 

To be totally honest I've been spoiled with absolute treasures this year, and we're only ten days into the New Year. My friends over at the Two Witches Podcast sent me some beautiful swag along with some truly awesome toys as a belated Xmas gift. Not sure what to do with these stickers but they will go someplace special. 

And also there was this amazing piece by the great artist, Cat Feather (Cat_Blether)! Inspired by the works of LaVoreGirls and VoreVids, Cat was able to conjure this piece into existence. Gotta love those teeth! I absolutely adore her work and I hope she makes more fun stuff soon. 

So yeah, things feel a bit better personally. My health is improving, life is changing, and new options are opening up for me. Hopefully the same is happening to you too. Even if the world is rotting away right now we can still have a bit of fun. 

Join the Church of the SubGenius. Praise "Bob"! www.subgenius.com